Thursday, September 1, 2011

8 Weeks and Craving Ice Cream......

So I have a few different things on my mind tonight.  I apologize in advance because I feel like my mind is all over the place, so chances are, so will this post.  I am also going to warn you in advance because I am going to undoubtedly make someone mad with this post.

"8 weeks and craving ice cream....."
I am sure you have seen similar statuses posted all over your Facebook news feed.  Some of you know what it is about, and I am betting that many of you reading this are male, curious about what is going on.  What is it all about?  Well it's another breast cancer awareness chain game. 

I personally don't understand.  I don't understand what playing these types of games has to do with breast cancer awareness?  How does this bring awareness to anyone?  And more importantly, why are the men not supposed to participate?  Did the person who started these not realize that men get breast cancer too?  There have been several of these games played over the last couple years.  This one is about your birthday, there was one that had to do with bras that made national news, there was one last year that had to do with where you leave your purse, and one earlier this year that had to do with your shoe size.  All of them produce the strange status updates like, "8 weeks and craving ice cream", or "I like it on the coffee table", or "8 inches :(", that inevitably leave the men wondering what us women are up to.  Does it make people laugh?  Yes.  Are games like this on Facebook fun?  Yes.  What I don't think is funny is cancer.  Any form of it.  And I don't understand how playing games on Facebook is bringing any type of awareness to any kind of cancer. I feel like it's just kind of shooting in the dark, what exactly is it bringing awareness to?  I think most people by now have heard of breast cancer.  The cancer itself doesn't need awareness, and the fact that this does nothing to raise funds etc, just makes it kind of pointless to me.  Now if it raised awareness on early diagnosis, or maybe some facts that people may not know about, I would undoubtedly have no problem.  If people want to bring awareness to certain types of cancer, then donate your time or money to the cause, and invite your friends to do the same.  Start a fundraiser.  Donate your time and efforts to local community events that support cancer research.  Heck, even set up a Facebook page to help raise awareness to certain aspects of cancer that others may not know about.  Anything, but play a silly game that makes cancer into a joke.  Bottom line is:  I think these chain games are funny and entertaining, I just hate that 'breast cancer awareness' has to be attached to them.  I feel like it demeans the real awareness that needs to be shared, and turns it into a joking matter.  If these "chain games" were just that, games, with nothing attached, I would have no problem with a silly game to keep the guys guessing.   

Pat and I had this talk last year when the "purse" chain game was going around.  We couldn't figure out what our friends were talking about, so we Googled it.  When we figured out it was supposed to be about breast cancer awareness, we were both kind of dumbfounded.  We both agreed it didn't really make sense.  How was any awareness being brought to the table, and it certainly didn't seem like it would be inspiring people to donate to the cause.  When I saw these ones going around this year, it definitely brought back the conversations we had last year, and really brought it all to the surface.

Before I move on, to those of you who are friends with me on Facebook I hope you are not offended by what I have said.  I know many of you have posted the above status with your details, and I just want to say that I do not think any less of you for doing so, and I hope you understand this is just my opinion of this awareness game.   This also was not directed at any of you personally, just something that has been on my mind the past couple days.  I know many of you were either doing it to get a rise out of the guys, or because you truly were trying to bring awareness to cancer, or both!  I know not everyone will agree with me, but I hope at least it gives you something to think about.

Before my husband passed away, I made a promise to him.  I promised him that I would bring awareness to leukemia.  I also promised him that I would advocate becoming a bone marrow donor, as well as cord blood donation.  I have been waiting for the perfect time to keep this promise I made, and now seems like that perfect time.  Today marks the start of the leukemia and lymphoma awareness month.  That, mixed with all the feelings I had about this "chain game" on Facebook, it just all seemed to fit together, and I couldn't NOT post about it tonight.  I want to bring some REAL awareness to the plate.

Before my husband was diagnosed with leukemia, I never really knew much about the disease.  When I heard the term, I always thought of it as a childhood cancer.  I knew it was cancer, but never really knew what the cancer was 'attacking'.  Pat and I had several conversations about this, and we both seemed to agree.  In case you don't know, leukemia is cancer of the blood or bone marrow.  There are several different types of leukemia, but I won't get into each of the different types today.  One of the main struggles that is different than most other types of cancer, is there is no tumor to remove, sometimes making it harder to treat.  Many leukemia patients are forced to get a bone marrow transplant, as their only hope for survival.  A bone marrow transplant may have saved my Husband's life.  He never got that far.  Had there been someone out there, somewhere, that they could have used, my husband may have survived.  Most people are aware of organ donation.  Most people know about blood donation.  Most people even know about plasma donation these days, but you don't hear too much about bone marrow donation.  Maybe I am just completely naive, but I don't know that I had even heard about it before I came in contact with this terrible disease.  And if I had heard of it, I sure had no idea how to sign up to be one, or what all the details were, or how GREAT the need is, or that it could actually SAVE someone's life.  I encourage each and every one of you reading this today, to please sign up to be a donor.  Please sign up to save someone's life.  To save someone's family.  I am not asking you to do this, my Husband is.  I made a promise to him to educate people about donating.  He told me that he didn't want another family to have to go through what we had gone through.  He told me that he didn't want all his pain to be in vain, and that if we could help another family out there, it would all be worth it.  The process is simple.  You fill out a questionnaire online, and they send you a kit.  Go to "Be a Match" to join or to learn more information.
Another route of donation that I am sure some of you have heard of, is cord blood donation.  Another misconception I feel is out there, is that many people think they have donated their cord blood.  Well, you may have donated your cord blood, but if you just signed a consent form of some kind, it wasn't donated to be used in this way.  Most likely it was donated for research purposes.  Cord blood can be used for transplantation, when there are no close matches in adults.  This can truly save someone's life, and it's saddening that many times it is just discarded.  So if you are pregnant, or plan on becoming pregnant, please look into donating the cord blood.  It will take a little time and energy on your part, but you may be saving someone's life.  Make sure you look into it early, and discuss it with your doctor, because as I understand it you have to have everything planned by 35 weeks gestation.

I feel like this is the single most important post I have blogged about since Pat has been gone, and I am asking for your help.  Not only am I asking you to become a donor, but I am asking you to share this post with as many people as you can.  Please share on facebook, twitter, email, however you can.  I want to honor my husband by bringing as much awareness to this topic as possible!  Thank you for your support and help!

I hope I made an ounce of sense tonight.  So much on my mind that I wanted to get out, and I hope it was read-able at the least.  I miss my husband.  I want him back in my arms.  Unfortunately I can't have that.  If I can help one family avoid the devastation we have dealt with, at least I will know his pain was not in vain.  I know he would be happy with that.

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